by Haven Gillispie
I am 29 years old, have suffered from severe anxiety, fatigue and every thing pms list for as long as I can remember. About 3 months ago I had a hunch it was all hormonal and have randomly casually talked to a few doctors, the woman that owns our local herb store and been reading like crazy!
I started paying attention to my symptoms, when they come and when they go and I can tell you like clockwork how it goes. I'm trying to make sense of it all to figure out how to treat myself because I don't know how much more of it I can live with. It starts about 10 days after the last day of my period. I feel myself getting impatient, short tempered and easily annoyed that's how I know it's beginning. Add in all the symptoms of pms and pmdd and by the end of the next like 14 or 15 days I am literally suicidal because I just can't live inside my own brain and body anymore. My kids hate me, my husband has dealt with about all he can take, my house is a disaster because I am so fatigued and detached that I don't care what it looks like.
It is easy for an onlooker to say "get ahold of yourself" I say it to myself over and over but I just can't. I can't change the way I feel no matter how hard I try. The day my period starts it all pretty much stops dead and that is the ONLY thing that keeps me on this earth- knowing that relief is on it's way. I can't live like this anymore. You can tell the day after my period ends though that I feel great. My house is spotless, I am energetic, motivated, kind, patient, thoughtful, I am me! I get one week a month that I really feel good. the week after my period. Which means if you really think about it, I feel good 12 out of 52 weeks a year. Over the next couple of days I am going to keep reading this web site and what people have had to say. I just found it moments ago. I have a tube of progesterone in my cabinet waiting to be opened. This is my last hope.