Menopause - wish it were over!

Menopause was very confusing for me, and still is, because my doctor never explained how it worked. Even now, my obgyn calls me "post-menopausal," even though I am very obviously still in the throws of menopause.

I initially went in to see an obgyn for abnormal bleeding. There was no rhyme or reason to my bleeding - it would occur off and on at various times and for weeks at at a time. One time I bled for nearly a month. Another doctor recently (an endocrinologist) verified that I am "menopausal," not "Post-menopausal." So now that I know I am still menopausal, that helps me to accept what I cannot change and deal with it. My obgyn says I have uterous hyperplasia and prescribed Provera, which my insurance recognizes only generics, so I have taken medroxyprogesterone for over 3 years now. I have gone through the worst time of my whole life, with not only aches and pains, eye trouble, acne, itchy skin, tender legs and hurting feet, not to mention total exhaustion and sleeplessness, but also being overheated most of the time, and bleeding intermittently.

The doctor kept giving me ultrasounds and biopsies and a D & C which showed "striping," which I learned was a terrible thing. The biopsies were very painful and I did not want to endure any more D & Cs. I was at the end of my rope about 6 months ago when I screamed out in pain at the time of biopsy and it hurt for two days. The other day I asked the doctor if I can stop the progesterone, since I had begun thyroid treatment (Synthroid) and hoped that possibly that would take care of my problem. He said I could, so now I am wondering if I should just stop or should I withdraw gradually? (I forgot to ask him - actually, don't think I should have to, but that's another issue!) That (discontinuing progesterone) is the reason I am reading up on it, but have not found the answer yet. Anyway, the progesterone did help my bleeding to stop, but that may have been an artificial fix and if it starts up again after I stop the progesterone, the doc says he will have to start all over again.

I don't understand why I couldn't just start taking the progesterone again on my own if I need to. Maybe someone there can help? I am really worried now because my insurance is changing and they will be charging me for every little thing and I may not be able to afford the close monitoring I had these past 3 years. By the way, my mother says her periods just stopped and she never had any signs of menopause. I am making up for her, to say the least! I started menstruation at 12 and am just now in menopause at age 61. So go figure!