End of the rope

by TR

Insurmountable mount Everest and pigs can fly. That's how overwhelming my journey feels to me. I have gone from being the life of the party, good humoured, kind person, to someone even my kids (I should say especially my kids) don't want to be around. Hell, I don't even want to be around me.

Around 39 years of age my life took a subtle, dramatic change that will bring me to my knees in the course of the following three years. The thoughts, the feelings, the images, the apathy, the emotional pain, the risk, the drama and the... it just goes on and on and on.

I went to therapy for 2 years (after that I couldn't afford it) it took my therapist one year of weekly visits to convince me I was not crazy. Almost four years later I am about to turn 43 in about a month, I've been up and down so many times that its hard to even imagine there is a way out of this emotional life sucking hell! I have been to therapy, I have taken Paxil, Wellbutrin and the drugs of my well intentioned super busy doctors are just not cutting it. I still feel like total s@#! By reading and talking and searching it looks like my hormonal imbalance is out to get me... so far its winning.

From the progesterone deficiency symptoms list, you might as well put my name on it. Today, after reading a book, that led me to this website. I feel hopeful. I am going to try the suggested progesterone cream and see what happens.

Thank you.

Comments for End of the rope

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Oct 08, 2009
End of the rope
by: Wray

Hi TR. Your story sounds like mine, except I was older when it happened to me. No you are not crazy, in fact most 'crazy' people are suffering from severe imbalances, either from their hormones or a lack of nutrients their body needs and is simply not getting. Drugs merely mask the symptoms, if they do that, they do not cure the problem.

Judging by the drugs you were taking I would suggest you use a minimum of 200mg/day progesterone. Please watch for oestrogen dominance symptoms, more about this can be found on this web page.

Progesterone does raise serotonin and dopamine levels, much as Paxil and Wellbutrin do, but without the side affects. But I feel you could do with more help than just progesterone. Please consider taking tryptophan, this is the amino acid precursor to serotonin, which is low in depression, insomnia, anxiety, OCD, a stomach in knots, aches and pains, hot flushes, a tight chest and more. It helps stabilise blood sugar as it?s involved with appetite control. Often a sharp drop in blood sugar causes depression and anxiety. This drop can also cause a hot flush, studies have found tryptophan helps with these.

Serotonin is the precursor to melatonin our sleep hormone, supplementing with tryptophan helps with insomnia. Start with 250mg/day about half an hour before bed and away from food. Tryptophan needs an insulin spike to push it into the brain, so take with about 1/4 glass of fruit juice or water and a biscuit. Take 25mg B6 and 300mcg folic acid with it, to convert it into serotonin. Increase the dose slowly in 250mg increments until you find the optimum, no need to increase the vitamins. If you wake during the night, have another dose ready by your bedside, together with some juice. Take it upon waking, without getting out of bed. You should drop off to sleep soon after. It is safe to go up to 5000mg/day.

Another effective antidepressant amino I suggest you take is tyrosine, this is the amino acid precursor to dopamine. To begin with take 250mg/day in the morning, plus 100mg B3 and 300mcg folic acid for conversion. Gradually increase the dose until the optimum is found, no need to increase the vitamins. It is safe to go up to 5000mg/day.

Another wonderfully calming amino acid is taurine, particularly for the heart. Take 500mg/day, increasing till the optimum is found. Take 25mg of the co-factor vitamin B6 too. It is safe to go up to 5000mg/day. Inositol can be helpful in depression as it raises serotonin levels and helps stabilise blood sugar levels. Take 2000-4000mg/day. Levels of 12g/day have been given for OCD and depression. Vitamin B3 (niacin or nicotinic acid, nicotinamide or niacinamide) is an antidepressant vitamin, take 100-300mg/day. Levels of 1500mg/day of niacinamide have been given for anxiety. Niacinamide does not cause flushing of the skin, niacin does. Take care, Wray

Nov 29, 2009
Can't thank you enough
by: Anonymous

Hi Wray, it has been a while, I have been traveling and pursuing each venue of information I can afford to find an easy way to make it through this. Your advice echoes the many educated advice I have read and heard from different expert authors in the field. You are right I do need something else other than progesterone and I am already taking some of the amino acids you advised.

At this point I welcome ANY advice, as this premenopausal monster seems to not want to let go of me. I'm weary and oh so tired, but came across a magnificent book by Mia Lundin called "Female Brain Gone Insane" and I think every woman who is dealing with hormonal inmbalance has to read it. It is just out of this world... my search continues and I just keep begging to God to help me make till I find the answer for me.

With all my appreciation, TR.

Jan 31, 2010
End of the rope
by: Wray

Hi TR. Sorry about the late reply, but I can't keep up with the questions coming in! Love the title of the book you mention, so apt! Are you using enough progesterone? You really do need at least 200mg/day if not more. One woman who wrote to me was using 900mg/day, at my suggestion she dropped it to 600mg but used it hourly, it still worked. Admittedly her problem was heavy continual bleeding, but the high dose worked. Using it hourly also keeps the level up. Are you taking big enough doses of the aminos? The standard dose in caps is not enough, please try to take the amounts I suggested. I'm not sure of the symptoms you still have, but I do hope some have been relieved. Take care, Wray

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